Words on Voldemort
There are so many things to joke about in the world. My friends and I prefer to joke about things unmentionable. No, I'm not talking about underwear or those things you do when you think no one is watching, I'm talking about the one person who has a an entire sentence for a name. The one, the only He-who-must-not-be named, Lord Voldemort!!
Now stop cowering and join in the fun!
Advertisements:
In the world of medicne, wouldnt it be nice...
Now you can get rid of Voldemort in 3 easy steps with Dark Mark removal paste!
Voldemort: for all hair types, except for Muggle/Mudblood. leaves smelling death-fresh!
Voldemort sings: "I've got the urge to herbal!"
Voldemort powder: Keeps you baby's ass from getting chapped
Surgeons General Warning: Voldemort has been known to cause death, blindness, death, cancer, death, arthritis, death, death, head aches, death, cold sores, vertigo, death, death and death.
Culinary...
Voldemorts Lair - where the third killing is always on the house
It slices, it dices, it juliennes fries! It's Voldemort!!
Note: Sorry, no C.O.D.'s, no checks, we do not accept credit cards, orders made on Friday will take an extra week to process, there is a charge of $12.99 for shipping and destroying, American currency not excepted, hours of operation are Monday and Thursday from 4:00pm to 4:30pm Georgia time.
Independant business...
Voldemort's: Fine makers of death since 1948
Home products
Can't get rid of that unsightly neighbor? Why, you need Vold-e-way, the only cleanser designed to rid you of the greatest stain of all - people!
Scented Dark Mark-shaped air freshners... that really smell like Death! Deaden up your environment today.
Contraception...
Vold-e-mort
(Think of the trojan man comercial)
Oop! How'd this get in here?
Hooch and Snape ... Hmm, sound's like a drink.
Tell all your friends ^^
Hexing-Voldemort, the action figure. With neck breaking, arse freezing action. Not suitable for Muggles or young wizards with a Dark Fetish.
Caution: contains small pieces......of Dark Magic.
Scary, all-knowing-Dumbledore! With frightening, twinkling eye action! Yes, the man that knows everything, even the exact type of your ovarian conception, is now a child's plaything!
Caution: do not eat Earwax Bertie Bott's around him... he gets grumpy.
Dominatrix-Hooch, the action figure. With whip cracking arm action!
Malfoy Section
It foos, it moos, and seduces your children! It's the amazing Malfoynator 5001.
Note: Wand not included (because he's to sexy for his wand! >D
--Madam Hooch